Not Enough
by aprilshowers-wetkisses
Summary: He has no excuses. He loves Kurt. But sometimes saying and feeling it, isn't enough.
1. Chapter 1

**Thump. **

**Thump. **

**Thump. **

_Gasp._

_Grunt._

_Moan._

_"My boyfriend will be home soon." _

The man responds by tugging on his clothes. He leans down to kiss-devour- him.

Blaine sighs.

It's wrong.

He loves Kurt. And like always, his chest constricts.

The thought of his boyfriend, the man he wants forever.

But Kurt's busy,his school takes up the majority of the time.

Blaine just needs a little something.

He pushes Kurt from his thoughts.

Pulling on his pants, he stumbles to the kitchen.

The lights on.

Kurt's there.

Kurt stares at him. Rolling an apple in his hands.

Blaine's throat tightens.

His pulse racing.

_"Kurt."_

That's all he can say.

Kurt taps his boots against the table.

**Thump.**

**Thump.**

**Thump.**

Kurt's body language is defensive. His spine straight. His arms crossed. His lips stuck in a rigid line.

But his eyes, they betray him.

They betray him like always.

The tears are filling them.

_"Kurt. Please. I love you." _

The first tear overflows over and slides down his cheek.

It's an invitation for the rest to follow.

Words are erupting from Blaine's mouth.

"_I'm sorry."_

_"It didn't mean anything."_

"_He's no one."_

_"Please don't leave me."_

_"I love you."_

_"It's a mistake."_

_"Please don't cry."_

They aren't even words to Kurt.

Just sounds.

Kurt can't stop crying.

He's at the point of sobbing and clutching at himself.

Blaine's hands reach out, but they jerk back right before he touches Kurt.

It's not fair. It's not okay. He doesn't have the right to touch Kurt.

Not anymore.

Blaine _cries_.

And his tears spark something in Kurt.

**Anger**.

Kurt's screaming.

Blaine can't blame him. He can't even defend himself.

Blaine finds himself sitting on the kitchen floor.

The same floor that Kurt and Blaine have had sex on.

Blaine breaks out into another round of sobs.

He has **fucked up**.

Kurt's screaming slowly descends. Blaine can't help but raise his eyes.

Kurt's watery eyes.

His wet cheeks.

His nose red.

His teeth worrying his lips.

Kurt meets his gaze and holds it. Kurt's words are slice deep,

_"What gives you the right to be crying right now?"_

Blaine chokes. "Kurt-"

Kurt starts up,

_"What gives you the right to even shed a fucking tear right now?"_

_"Why are you even crying?"_

_"You did this. This is your own fault."_

_"Who is that guy?"_

_"How long have you been cheating on me?"_

_"Why are you cheating on me?"_

**"I thought you loved me."**

Blaine can hardly breathe as he listens to Kurt. Blaine shakes his head.

_"I do love you. I'll always love you. He's no one. I love you so so much."_

Kurt's voice shakes as he picks up his bag.

_"Apparently, you don't love me enough." _


	2. Chapter 2

I said I was finished with this story, but... whatever. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

**Clink.**

**Clink.**

**Clink.**

He's an hour early. He taps his spoon against his coffee cup. The shop he chose was small, a bit homely, and would be perfect in any other situation. Blaine runs his fingers through his unruly hair again and again. It's been 2 weeks since he's seen

_my_

_no he's not mine_

_because you messed up_

_it's your fault_

_not my,_

Kurt.

Blaine has gotten rid of that bed set. He first burned the sheets. Moved on to their mattress. Finally threw out the whole bed frame. He bought a new Tempur-Pedic mattress that Kurt's lusted over for years but never bought.

_Kurt had great self control._

Blaine will give Kurt total control of the bedroom designs. He can pick out whatever he wants. He sits back and closes his eyes, picturing Kurt's face when he's fully focuses. Kurt's eyebrows scrunch up and he'll stand on a chair in the opening to the room. His

_gorgeous _

_feeling_

_perfect_

eyes scanning the room and plotting out the designs. Then Kurt will be so happy with Blaine. And Blaine will finally propose. They will travel to Paris and have the greatest wedding of the century. He can feel Kurt's body wrapped around him. His lips, arms, legs, everything.

And everything sounds perfect.

Blaine knows he's messed up. That's obvious. But all relationships go through rough patches.

_Right?_

It's only healthy for a bit of a fight in a relationship.

_Yes. Everything will be okay._

The door creaks open.

_Kurt._

_He's early. _

_He wants to see me too._

_He misses me._

_He loves me._

_I love him._

_Everything will be okay._

He inclines his head a bit as a greeting.

_Okay, not the kiss you were hoping for._

_But Everything will be okay._

He listens to the voice he could recognize anywhere. He watches his

_no, not mine_

_Yes. Yes. Yes._

_Please._

Kurt pick up his coffee and slowly make his way over. Blaine's practically vibrating in his seat. He's nervous but so, so excited. Screw the bedroom plans, maybe he'll propose now. The moment Kurt sits down he opens his mouth.

"_Why did you ruin our relationship like that?"_

That was not what Blaine expected.

_Of course that's what I expected. Of course. I'm not dumb. He hates me. I fucked up. _

_Stop._

_ No._

_ It's okay._

_ Everything will be okay._

"_Kurt, no. I didn't think like that. I really do love you. You are my everything." _

"_Was it something I did? Were you bored with me? Was I not satisfying you sexually? Emotionally? Blaine, I just don't understand."_

Kurt's not crying. He looks hurt. He looks broken.

_And I did that._

"_Please Kurt! It will never happen again! I swear on my life. Please, please just forgive me. Please, please tell me you love me." _

Blaine's aware that the two baristas in the shop are downright staring and leaning forward to listen. He wants to turn around and yell at them.

_Stop looking at me like that!_

_You don't understand!_

Kurt's eyes are filled with tears and pity.

"_Oh Blaine, I'll always love you. And I don't hold grudges, you know that. But I can't forget."_

Blaine chokes. He stutters out a strange proposal and pulls out a little blue box. Kurt stands up and reaches towards him.

_Kiss me. _

_Forget, _

_forgive, _

_love me._

Kurt pulls the jewelry box out of his hand and drops it back into Blaine's pocket. Kurt grips Blaine's head in his hands. His fingers rubbing, tapping, soothing against his head.

"_We need a break, Blaine."_

Blaine's eyes are clouded. He's sniffling. Kurt pulls out a tissue from his bag and cleans up his tears. When he finishes, Kurt squeezes Blaine's shoulder but refuses to look him in the eye. He spins around and walks out the door like it's nothing. One of the baristas walk over slowly, offering a few napkins for his face.

"_Are you okay?"_

He laughs.

"_No."_

* * *

_If you have time, reviews would be lovely._


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